uneventful in the ghetto

The Ghetto has not been providing many humorous stories lately, so here's a regular ems story:
Last week as I arrived to work and before my first cup of coffee, we got sent to a active labor call. NOT a favorite of mine. I am hip to the miracle of birth aspect but its still messy and gross. When we arrived, mom had already given birth to a very small baby boy right on the carpet. Nobody in the house spoke English and worse nobody was doing anything for mom or baby. Estimated gestation 30 weeks. He was less than 2 lbs, very blue and we gave him an APGAR of 2. Someone had tried to clamp the cord with a piece of plastic shopping bag for some reason. Some quick BLS and rapid transport to a NICU facility appears to have had a good outcome for baby boy. We arrived with a pink oxygenated little guy who appeared to have no ill effects APGAR 7. Its been a week now and last I heard he is still doing well. coincidentally the ambulance medic was working one last shift before she went on maternity leave. So she was very glad to see our little guy did so well.